1) Will be welcomed back.
2) Will always get the “Sorry, but we’re busy that weekend” response.
3) “Yeah sure.” No choice, otherwise it’ll cause family drama.

Q: Does relationship matter when you’re a houseguest? 

A: Yes. If it’s your best friend, sibling, or parent’s home, naturally, you’ll both be super comfortable, presumably. However, if it’s your in-law’s, granny’s house, or distant relative, you may not want to put your feet up and leave your dishes in the sink.

Making Yourself At Home: You’re on vacation and you want to feel relaxed. Leaving your stuff everywhere and helping yourself to whatever you want may work for you. Your host may not view it the same way.

• Don’t expect the host to be at your service 24 hours a day. 
• Don’t expect the host to accept your child’s rude behavior without eventually saying something.
• Don’t assume you can post photos of them or their home without their consent.
• Don’t overindulge. Like getting drunk or over eating requiring you to embrace the toilet all night.
• Do maintain discretion if romance strikes.

Special Requests: So you like your coffee freshly brewed by 6:57 AM. Or, you only eat locally sourced organic fruit. Plan ahead and get it yourself. If you require special dietary items, bring them with you, or research in advance where you can purchase them or have them delivered.

• Don’t assume you can freely invite guests.
• Do ask where you can keep your special dietary items before spreading them all over the kitchen counter.
• Do ask if your pet is welcome. They may have allergies, just isn’t their thing, or have a pet that doesn’t get along with others.
• Don’t show up empty-handed. (Bring coffee, muffins, wine…) If you’re flying, have it delivered or purchase when you arrive.
• Don’t take down décor you find offensive. Not without a calm and polite conversation. Be prepared to live with it.

Host’s Lifestyle: You may be in vacation mode, but the host may still have to work or have other obligations. Circumstances like this will require you to adjust and accommodate them, especially if they work from home. This can be easy to do for a couple of days. However, it’s an extended stay, staying elsewhere might be more comfortable for everyone.

• Don’t lecture your host on how you can improve their décor, lifestyle, diet, child-rearing. This is the quickest way to find yourself checking into the nearest hotel.
• Don’t show up unannounced or earlier than agreed upon. Even if it’s granny. Text or call in advance. 
• Don’t expect the host to adapt to your eating or sleeping schedule.
• Don’t extend your stay without consulting your plans with the host. Research alternate accommodations in case they can’t host you longer or, don’t offer. 
• Do give the host some space. Take walks or plan an outing or meal without them.  
• Do send a thank-you note, buy them dinner, leave or send a gift of thanks.

Final Thoughts: 
Whether you’re the host or the houseguest, maintaining boundaries is necessary for a mutually pleasurable stay. This requires communication and respect.

Also, keep in mind that people change due to new experiences, becoming parents, living with a new partner, or personal growth. What used to be acceptable, may no longer be. If the differences are too great for you, consider this your last stay; next visit, rent a condo nearby. 

“Asking someone to switch seats on an airplane.” 
 https://nypost.com/2024/06/11/lifestyle/what-to-do-when-someone-asks-you-to-switch-seats-on-a-plane/

“Politics Over Profit-Do your political comments alienate clients?” 
https://rosalindarandall.com/politics-over-profit/

“How to Graciously Handle Family Personality Quirks” 
https://rosalindarandall.com/family-personality-quirks-tips-on-how-to-handle-them-with-grace/

For additional information: https://rosalindarandall.com/etiquette-training/