There are things you just shouldn’t do to someone the day before Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day can be a day of pressure, not pleasure. When one person in the relationship has high expectations, and the other thinks that a card and bath oil is perfect, watch out!

Expectations are what usually ruins a Valentine’s Day. If you’re expecting a marriage or “let’s move in together” proposal, but haven’t talked about it, brace yourself.

Here are 5 things not to do the day before Valentine’s Day:

1. Buy an engagement ring.

  • You’ll pay more.
  • You’ll probably settle for a ring because you’re desperate.
  • You might ask yourself why you’re making this last-minute decision.

2. Get drunk.

  • You might make a call or text telling them how you really feel. Or ask about their cute best friend.
  • You may text the wrong person.

3. Cancel.

  • Unless it’s an emergency that most of society would also consider an emergency.
  • Be prepared to hear about it, and probably lose their respect.
  • Depending on their philosophy, they can make your life miserable on social media.

4. Breakup.

  • I don’t blame you if they’ve cheated, robbed, or are incessantly sending texts directing how everything “better go” tomorrow, or insisting you better propose and how.
  • Do not cancel or breakup through a third party. If you’re mature enough to date, be mature enough to handle your love life. Too harsh? Not for the recipient.
  • If you intended to break-up, shoulda-woulda-coulda is not an acceptable reason. It is a rude, disrespectful and an unkind thing to do to someone. Is there a way out, even the day before? Even though it still stinks, yes.

You might consider: (Doesn’t guarantee it’ll smooth things out; it’s merely a nice gesture.)

a) This deserves a call, not a text! Immediately call your date, apologize, try to explain, take full responsibility, and offer the evening at your expense.

b) A day or so later, follow up with a sincere apology. Whether they accept or not, is another thing.

5. Change your “relationship status”.

  • If you’ve broken up only in your mind, don’t change it.
  • If this is “the way” you’re notifying them of the breakup, don’t change it.
  • Wait until the day after Valentine’s Day, if only out of respect for them. Let them be the one to change it first. This move is a bit “high school,” but for their sake, let them have their dignity.


Next time, try to handle your business in time, with consideration, and kindness. Most last-minute decisions may take away your burden, but it is bombshell for the recipient.

Etiquette Expert/Trainer, Author, Media Source 

Nationally recognized etiquette expert with over twenty years of providing trainings, and serving as a source for media.

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Etiquette tips are general and serve as perspective and options. Every situation is unique.